Brian can’t sleep. He doesn’t want to wake up Justin at 5am, so he slowly creeps out of bed after unwinding himself from Justin’s warm arms. He hates to leave, but he knows that he will only toss and turn miserably and wake up Justin. He grabs a blanket, a small wooden box, a glass of water and his lighter and plops down in front of the TV. He changes the channel until he finds Strangers with Candy on Comedy Central. He loves to watch that show, and it is especially good while stoned. That is his plan for the early morning hour: get stoned, laugh at TV, and then try to sleep again. This combination usually does the trick when he can’t sleep. A glass of wine would have been even better, but they are all out. Brian hopes that the pot he has left is some strong stuff. He slowly starts his ritual of rolling a joint. He loves the simplicity of rolling papers. So many people find that it is a complexity that they will never figure out. Mikey doesn’t have a clue where to start, Justin has rolled a few, but Brian is the joint-rolling master. Being an amazing athlete in high school helped him make friends quickly, but it was ultimately his dexterity with joints that made the newfound friends gravitate to him and stay. Brian smiles to himself as the flood of memories from college wash through his brain. Lindsey and Brian bonded over booze and pot soon after they met. There is nothing like sharing your stoned and crazy thoughts and having the other person know exactly what you mean. There is something so revealing and intimate about it. It bonds some people so tightly that they will even have a kid together. Gus is a great kid, though. Now that Brian is out of a job, he has a lot more time to spend with his son. Gus and Justin are his life. Brian lights up the end of the joint and brings the other end to his lips. The first few hits are paper and smoke, but the third hit is all good. Brian feels his shoulders relax as he takes another drag. Brian looks toward the bedroom to see if too much light from the TV is bothering Justin’s slumber. Brian can see the top of Justin’s head sticking out of the covers. He loves to sleep on his stomach with his face practically buried in the covers. Brian loves to watch him sleep. Brian takes a few more drags as he watches the angelic sleeping head of his lover. Brian turns his head from Justin’s form and becomes mesmerized by the TV. Strangers with Candy is airing the episode where the faculty has the students pairing up into fake marriages. He loves the scene where Mr. Chuck Noblet and Mr. Geoffrey Jellineck are having dinner at Mr. Noblet’s house. Mr. Jellineck is supposed to be new to the Noblet home, but he and Mr. Noblet have been having a love affair for a while. The funniest scene happens when they are sitting down at dinner, and Mr. Noblet wants Mr. Jellineck to come into the basement and see his “drill press”. Mr. Jellineck says, “I’ve seen that press a million times, CHUCK!” Chuck’s wife asks when he’s seen it. He tries to cover it up by saying, “I mean I’d like to see it a million times!” It’s hilarious! Brian can’t help but laugh, because the pot lands just as that scene unfolds. It’s one of those shows that you have to see to believe. Brian had always thought that Strangers with Candy was a more accurate portrayal of gay life than Will & Grace ever could be. Most fags Brian sees are in the closet and in love with someone they shouldn’t be. Strangers with Candy is soon over, so Brian rolls two more joints then stands up from the couch with the blanket wrapped around him. He walks to the windows to smoke and look at the sun rising over the city. As the light and the pot wash over him, he hears Justin pad across the hardwood floor in only his underwear to join him at the window. “Morning,” he mumbles to Brian as he reaches around Brian to grab the half-smoked joint. “Hey,” Brian responds. “Did I wake you?” “No,” he answers. “The smell woke me up. I wanted some.” “Sorry I didn’t wake you up, but I was just having trouble sleeping. You seemed to be sleeping just fine, so I left you alone.” “Thanks.” Justin hands the joint back to Brian and slips his arms around Brian’s waist. Brian tilts Justin’s head up, turns the joint around, grasps it in his teeth, and blows the smoke into Justin’s awaiting mouth. Brian loves to get Justin stoned this way. It feels sexy to bring his mouth so close to Justin’s, but not to kiss him. Brian hands the joint back to Justin. “You have the rest. I already smoked one by myself.” Justin nods and puffs on the joint. Brian pulls Justin into his arms, so they can both look out at the sun. Brian kisses Justin’s neck as the smoke swirls around them. Brian can feel his cock starting to respond to Justin being so close to him. The pot intensifies every sensation for Brian. He loves to smoke before he and Justin fuck. It makes everything hotter and more intense. Their sex is usually intense enough without drugs, but pot just makes it five times more sensual. It also helps Brian to show his feelings more than he normally does. He loves to caress Justin body and just enjoy the feel of his smooth skin. Brian is getting harder as he thinks more of Justin’s smooth body. Justin has almost finished the rest of the joint, and Brian can’t wait to get him back into the bed. Justin walks to put the remainder in the ashtray, and Brian follows closely behind him. Justin turns around and is surprised by Brian’s closeness. “Hey, you following me?” “Yep.” Brian pulls Justin into his arms and kisses his warm lips softly, licking his lips slowly with his tongue. He then plunges his tongue inside Justin’s mouth to explore more of his lover’s sweet mouth. The sensations are overwhelming. He can feel Justin’s breath coming out of his nose, can feel his own heart beginning to race with the anticipation of making love to Justin. Because that is what it feels like to Brian. Fuck all of that bullshit he says all the time about not believing in love. He is in love, believes in love, and loves to love Justin. It makes Brian’s head spin sometimes. He is so glad to have Justin back in his life, hopefully for good. Brian can’t imagine his life without his Sunshine, so he’s trying not to fuck this up again. Brian can’t get enough of Justin’s skin. He starts to kiss Justin’s neck, biting a little with his teeth. Marking a spot on Justin that will let everyone know he belongs to him. All mine, all mine, all mine. “All mine…” Brian whispers out loud. “What?” Justin asks distractedly. “You’re all mine,” Brian says. “All mine…” “Mmmm,” Justin moans. “All yours…” Brian begins to suck on Justin’s rosy nipples. Justin leans his head down and runs his tongue down Brian’s long neck. There are so many moans of pleasure that it is hard to determine which moan came from which man. Justin lands small kisses down Brian’s neck and collarbone before Brian kneels down in front of Justin. Brian pulls down Justin’s gray underwear and tosses them toward the bedroom. He puts his hands on both of Justin’s hips and begins to lick the entire underside of Justin’s cock, flicking his tongue over the most sensitive glands. Justin moans as Brian takes his whole cock into his mouth. The musky smell of Justin mingles with the pot eliciting an intense moan from Brian. It is so intense that he has to stop for a second to collect himself. Justin looks down at Brian. “What are you thinking about?” he asks. “I was hoping there was a way to bottle your scent,” Brian replies grinning up at Justin. Justin kneels down to be face to face with Brian. He reaches behind Brian’s neck and pulls him into a fiery kiss. The two men grope anxiously at each other, wanting to feel every smooth inch. “Brian…” Justin murmurs as they break for a small breath. Brian pulls away to look at Justin’s face. “You’re stoned, Sunshine.” “So are you,” Justin responds accusingly. They both grin, gazing into each other’s hazy, reddened eyes. Brian can get so easily lost in those blue eyes that it scares him more than he would ever tell Justin. Only in this state can Brian admit to himself how much Justin means to him. Brian starts to feel his emotions trying to escape, and quickly kisses Justin so he won’t see. Justin laughs against Brian’s lips. Brian pulls back, trying to look as indignant as possible. “What?” Justin looks at Brian while trying to control his laughter. “I love you too, Brian.” “I never said that!” “You just did when you looked at me a minute ago. You can’t fool me, Brian. I saw it. You’re like an open book when you’re stoned. I’ve seen that look a million times. You have never been able to hide it from me.” Justin smiles down at Brian reassuringly. Brian sighs as he leans to kiss Justin’s shoulder tenderly. “I’m that obvious, huh?” “Yeah, especially when you’re stoned. You’re hopelessly in love with me, you know.” Brian doesn’t respond verbally. Instead he continues to enjoy the taste of Justin’s shoulder. The morning light streaming in from the window catches Brian’s eye. It is lighting up Justin’s blond hair, so it looks like it’s on fire. His pale shoulders shine brightly as Brian hones in on Justin’s delicate and sensitive neck. Brian can feel the moan reverberating in Justin’s throat as it makes his lips tingle with the vibration. “You’re so beautiful, Justin. I wish I were the artist right now. The light coming in is amazing on your skin.” Justin smiles and looks toward the beams of light bouncing off of his skin. Brian leaps up and heads for the bedroom. “Where are you going?” “I’ll be right back.” True to his word, he is back in less than a minute with the expensive camera that Vanguard had provided him with for his ad work. Luckily, they have completely forgotten that he has it. Justin groans. “Hey! You have no right to complain. What about all of the mornings I woke up to find you sketching me?” “I don’t object to pictures. I object to the fact that you’re not kissing me anymore,” Justin says with a smirk. “Well, you’ll have to wait.” Brian focuses through the stoned haze of his mind on his angelic subject. He directs Justin to keep moving in and out of the light. The digital camera gives him an immediate idea of how the picture will look. He loves modern technology. No more waiting for film to develop to see if you have a good shot. In between shots, Brian kisses and nuzzles Justin to keep him in an aroused state. He is less guarded in that state, and those are the shots he wants. Now he understands why Justin always sketches him when he was asleep. That is the only time all of his walls fall away. After about five minutes, Brian goes back to the coffee table to pick up the last joint he rolled. He takes a few drags then hands it to Justin. “You’re going to take pictures of me while I’m holding a joint?” “Don’t worry. It’s a digital camera—these photos will never have to be developed. They’ll just be ours.” Justin relaxes and begins to smoke and share the joint with Brian. Brian then sets the camera down, pointing it toward the square of light on the glossy, hardwood floor. Brian programs the camera to take a picture every ten seconds until it runs out of memory. He pulls Justin down with him into the sunlight. The light begins to dance off of both of them. They kiss as the camera continues to click away on its perch.