Epilogue: “Brian ... did you hear me?” asked Justin and he frowned at Brian's silence. “I heard you,” came the eventual, quiet response. “Well ... you might sound pleased,” stated the younger man, hoping the announcement of his return to Pittsburgh would have been met with some excitement. “I am ... of course I am,” came back Brian, but Justin couldn't miss the hesitation. “But ...” he offered and he heard Brian sigh. “Are you sure ... don't you think it's a bit soon?” asked the older man, cautiously. “After all ... you've only just received the recognition ... wouldn't now be the time to take advantage of that and build on it?” “It's taken five years to get this far ... don't give it up too soon ... ” “Exactly ... five years,” answered Justin and then he hesitated and frowned. “Don't you want me to come home?” he asked softly and he could detect the emotion that now crept into Brian's voice; an emotion that confused him, wondering whether Brian actually wanted him to come home, but then he understood the sincerity of the older man's words. “More than anything,” acknowledged Brian. “But only if you're 100% sure ...” and now Brian heard Justin sigh. “Caswell told me I'd conquered New York ... I know how this place works now ... I know who I have to see and where I have to be seen ... I've made all the contacts I need ... there's nothing stopping me painting in Pittsburgh and still showing out here ... after all ... I paint here and my stuff gets shown everywhere else ...” but what Justin didn't tell Brian was that he'd never painted better since they'd acknowledged their relationship; their time together drawing depths from Justin that even he didn't know existed. Brian was Justin's inspiration; the unconditional love affording the younger man the freedom to explore himself and his emotions with all the security in knowing Brian would always be there and support him in everything he did and that he loved him; a love Justin was more than happy to return. “As long as you're coming home for the right reason ...” stated Brian and Justin knew exactly what the man meant; as long as he was doing it for himself and no one else. “I'm coming home because I want to and because it's time ...” stated Justin and he heard the sigh of relief. “Then I can't wait ...” grinned Brian, his pleasure so evident in his voice, now that he was satisfied that Justin was indeed ready to come home and not doing it out of some sort of loyalty or concern for him. And putting down the phone, Brian couldn't stop grinning all day. Sunshine; his Sunshine, was coming home. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What Brian didn't tell Justin, was that a big party awaited him on his arrival home. Babylon had been decked out to perfection and even Emmett had to admit he'd excelled himself. Everyone was there; not just the usual patrons and the gang, including Debbie and Carl, but Jennifer, Tucker and Molly and also the staff of Kinnetik, whom Justin had gotten to know pretty well during his various trips back to the Pitts and his involvement in the business. A few old school friends, including Daphne, now a qualified doctor and her fiancé, Bill, a Computer Analyst, were there also; Daphne no longer declaring that she too, planned never to marry. But Justin's coming home party had actually started a lot earlier, but the first celebrations were very much a private affair; in fact there were just two people present. And with a bottle of Champagne on ice and awaiting their arrival back at the loft, said party got underway as soon as Brian and Justin were inside the door. Actually, that wasn't strictly true. The party in fact started in the elevator. Grinning like a Cheshire cat, Brian met Justin at the airport; having him home and finally together, even though he knew their careers were still bound to separate them from time to time, Brian knew his life would be complete. Any future separations wouldn't matter; they were still a couple and that's all that really counted. But the younger man hadn't left NYC straight after his announcement of coming home, there were things Justin had to take care of first, like arranging to have his gear, artwork and five years worth of accumulated possessions shipped back to Pittsburgh, but there was one thing he had decided. Justin knew that there were times when he would have to go to New York if he still wanted to be considered as someone who was part of the scene; he couldn't ignore that fact entirely. But he knew also that Brian would no longer doubt their love during those times. So, he decided to keep on the studio there. With the money from the award to start him off and selling more of his work, he could still afford to pay the rent, at least for a while, and so he decided it was a good investment. He'd need a base when he did go to New York and there was no way he would have the time to find new accommodation every time and set it up. But with everything that he needed either already shipped or in the suitcase and holdall that he brought with him, Justin practically ran through the airport in his hurry to get to Brian. Brian was waiting for him, and no longer needing to make huge gestures, he had with him, beautifully understated, one red rose and all the more romantic for all that, despite himself. Then they headed for the loft and the party started. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Then later, during the evening at Babylon when Brian was circulating and a few of the gang and friends were standing at the bar, Cyn asked Justin: “Has Brian told you his news?” and Justin shook his head. “No ... what?” and Ted grinned at him. “Brian's been nominated for a National Advertising Achievement Award ...” “You're kidding ...” exclaimed Justin. “But that's typical of Brian ... to keep something like that to himself ...” “I don't think he wanted to take anything away from your recent success,” stated Ted and Justin raised an eyebrow and nodded in acknowledgment; again that sounded typical of the man. “But he's running out of time where this particular accolade is concerned,” stated Cynthia and she and Ted both grinned as Justin frowned in confusion. “This particular award is for young advertising professionals ... 40 and under ... and Brian's 40 next year ...” Justin groaned. “Don't remind me ... I can imagine the trauma ...” “What trauma?” asked Michael, who'd now joined them and Justin turned towards him. “Brian's fortieth birthday next year ... his thirtieth was bad enough ...” Michael frowned. “He's not the only one approaching 40 remember,” stated Michael in reference to himself. “But I don't think he worries about his age as much as he used to ...” “Don't believe it,” smiled Justin. “He checks in the mirror for grey hair every morning ... he thinks I don't know ... “ and at that point Cyn dug him in the ribs as Brian joined them; draping his arms around Justin's shoulders. “This all looks very conspiratorial,” he stated, as he eyed the group suspiciously and Justin turned around in his arms and reached up to kiss him. “Okay ... what did I do?” asked the older man, frowning. “The National Advertising Achievement Award,” stated Justin and Brian groaned and then reaching out, poked Ted in the shoulder, making an educated guess as to who had let the cat out of the bag. “I haven't got it yet ...” “But even getting nominated is fantastic ... that alone will put Kinnetik under the spotlight ... it can only be good for the business ...” came back Justin and Ted nodded and rubbed the offending spot at the same time. “Could mean expansion ...” he stated. “New York,” added Justin grinning, knowing Brian's lifelong ambition had always been to open a branch of the agency there and Brian grinned back. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The loft in the West Virginia House was huge and with few structural changes, it would be relatively easy to convert into a studio for Justin. With proper wall and floor coverings and new windows in the gable ends as well as the roof to the rear of the building, there would be more than sufficient light and Brian commissioned the work to begin almost immediately. And Brian ensured everything was state of the art; from the fixtures and fittings to the computer program Justin sometimes used when he wanted to try something different. Brian's reasoning behind the purchase of course being that Justin would still, from time to time, help out with campaigns for Kinnetik, or at least that's what Brian said. Justin had nodded and smiled and wondered if this man would ever change, and then of course in the same breath, hoped he never would. Though Brian still kept the loft for when he was in town working late and sometimes for the use of visiting clients, he loved to spend time at the house once it felt like his and Justin's home, even if he was on his own sometimes. Gus had been a pretty regular visitor there in the last few years and now he loved coming to see his two Dads. He had a wonderful relationship with Justin and surprised the hell out of him one day by referring to him as Papa. Brian grinned but was secretly pleased that the boy accepted his and Justin's relationship without question. After all, Justin had known the youngster since the night he was born; the same length of time as he had in fact himself. But Justin was totally unprepared for Gus' use of that particular endearment. “That makes me sound so old ...” stated Justin, but it wasn't a complaint, just the fact that he was being referred to as someone's Dad at all was a shock. “Wait till we have our own ... then you will start to feel old,” stated Brian, still grinning. Now a tall wiry 9 year old, Gus's resemblance to Brian grew stronger every day, much to Melanie's dismay as her son was a constant reminder of who his Father was and there was nothing the youngster liked more than kick a soccer ball around the garden or take a dip in the pool, under strict supervision of course. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Much to everyone's delight, Brian did, in fact, win the National Advertising Achievement Premier Award for outstanding advertising professionals aged 40 and under; established by the American Advertising Federation as a way to recognize young talented individuals who were making a significant impact on the advertising industry, and there was no doubt that Brian's approach to advertising was doing exactly that. Not that his achievement wasn't controversial, but with several household names and organizations such as Liberty Air utilizing Brian's talents and their campaigns going national, Kinnetik certainly couldn't be ignored. With Justin as his partner this time, Brian attended the ceremony luncheon at the Waldorf Astoria in NYC, but on this occasion, unlike the previous advertising award Brian had won, there were no distractions. Brian received the accolades and Justin provided all the rewards needed. The impact of the award on Kinnetik was immediate and there was no way expansion was not an option, but the irony was not lost on them; the fact that now Justin had returned home, Brian had to spend more time in New York for a while as he established his business there. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With a huge party, followed by a very private celebration once again, Brian's fortieth birthday came and went without too much trauma, much to everyone's surprise. But then as Brian said, “When you look as good as I do ... why the fuck should I worry that people know how old I am ...” Justin blinked and for a moment wondered whether Brian was reverting to the time when he thought his looks and image were the only thing that mattered, but then he saw the twinkle in the man's eye; Brian knowing and accepting that he was now worth so much more than that and Justin grinned. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brian's business empire was seemingly unstoppable, taking him away on frequent visits, though he did try to keep them as short as possible. As well as Kinnetik's new offices in NYC, after the success of the club in New York, other clubs followed in Chicago, Philadelphia and Boston. It meant juggling and putting in the hours, but Brian managed several trips to Toronto annually and Gus came down at least twice. Over the next couple of years, and Justin reaching his own milestone of thirty, their individual lives continued to be busy. But trying to plan ahead as much as possible to spend part of each month together, Brian and Justin made the most of their shared time as Justin too was away on frequent trips and showing his work regularly, which was now providing him with a healthy income. When he wasn't painting, Justin still did the odd piece of work for Brian, and wanting to keep occupied all the time and with something in mind for the future, he had gone back to school in order to obtain his degree. The President of PIFA allowed him to take courses when convenient and was only too happy to have someone with Justin's now nationally and internationally acclaimed talent enrolled with them once again. And the school was also more than willing to forget the incident during the Stockwell campaign, considering that man's subsequent prison sentence. Brian couldn't believe what he was hearing when Justin told him what his intentions were; with the amount of success he'd achieved, a degree seemed somewhat superfluous. But Justin had decided that one day, he wanted to teach art, especially to young, talented gay artists and the children of gay couples, and he didn't feel he'd be justified in doing that unless he had at least a degree himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Chloe ... I am so very, very sorry,” stated Justin and he hugged his friend. He'd received the phone call and got on the next flight he could get to join her. “How did it happen?” Having relocated to Maine, Grant, Chloe and their twin girls had been on vacation in the country. Grant always liked to keep fit and being away from home hadn't stopped him from taking his daily run. But Chloe got worried when he didn't come back when she thought he would and it had taken her a little while to get the kids organized so she could go look for him. She'd sort of guessed straight away what had happened when she found him, lying by the side of the track unconscious, she'd seen it herself having worked in the E.R. before having the children. And knowing she shouldn't waste any time by waiting for an ambulance, even if one could make it which was doubtful, Chloe decided that the only course of action was to get Grant to hospital herself and she'd struggled to get him into the car and into town. The rural hospital didn't have a critical care unit and the bleeding anerysm had left Grant brain dead. As a doctor herself, Chloe knew there could be only one outcome and brokenhearted, had allowed the machines keeping him alive to be switched off. But not before she'd made sure that every one of Grant's organs could be harvested for transplant. That was something she knew her husband had believed in strongly and still being a fit young man, she knew he would have been delighted that other people might benefit from his death. But that didn't make his passing any the easier for all that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ One Year Later: After Grant's death the previous year, a man almost 10 years younger than Brian, Justin was worried. With ever increasing demands on his time, Brian seemed to be working even harder than ever. As well as his other interests, he still liked to be involved with the running of Babylon Pittsburgh; after all, it had been the first club he'd opened and besides, he still knew how to party when he had the time. In fact they both did, and frequent trips away from home still found both of them seeking release with other men, though the frequency for both of them had reduced noticeably. But one Monday afternoon in the office, Brian started to experience chest pains. Justin was in town and had dropped by on his way back from visiting his Mom and without a second thought, called the ambulance and Brian was taken to Allegheny General. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Having retained her maiden name, it was Dr. Daphne Chanders, resident Cardiologist who examined Brian and after the ECG and other relevant tests were carried out, she was pleased and relieved to announce that Brian's heart was in perfect working order, but that he was suffering from overwork. “Well ... it's stress ... this time ...” “But you know, Brian ... it's not uncommon for men in their forties to have heart attacks,” Daphne informed him. “You need to slow down ... unless you want to be the richest man in the cemetery ...” and she raised an eyebrow, but not really expecting a reply to her statement. Brian rolled his lips into his mouth and resisted looking at Justin, whose eyes were dark with concern. Brian knew how much he'd put his body through in the past. It wasn't just the testicular cancer he'd survived ten years ago and it's possible re-occurrence that came to mind, but also the drugs and alcohol he'd consumed in large quantities, as well as the incalculable amount of anonymous sex he'd indulged in since his teens and Brian realized that he'd been relatively lucky up till now. Daphne was right; why the hell was he doing this to himself? Brian had more money and success than he'd ever dreamed of and people relied on him for their livelihoods. But he also had other responsibilities. He had a husband and a son and though they'd talked about it in the past, he and Justin had never got around to having a family of their own and if he wasn't careful, he'd be too old to enjoy it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Well ... what are we going to do?” asked Justin later, back at the house and Brian nodded. “I know ... I haven't been fair with you ... all these business trips ...” “But I've have had my fair share of time away too,” admitted Justin. “We have our own careers and interests ... but maybe we both need to re-evaluate what we're doing and where we want to go ...” Brian nodded. “There's something else ... I think we should look at starting a family ... I don't think we should put it off ... I don't wanna leave it any longer,” stated Brian, revealing his fears at time passing and Justin grinned. “That's the best news I've heard in a long time ...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With some drastic re-organization and internal promotion, Brian significantly began to cut down on his workload. He knew he couldn't give it up totally, he was too young and still too driven to succeed. But when before he'd found it hard to delegate, now was the time to give other people their turn to shine and gradually, Brian started to take a back seat and a more relaxed attitude towards his business empire. Justin grinned as he watched Brian fight the urge to reach for the financial pages every morning to see how his clients were doing, but gradually, he got the man to relax and work just a few hours a day or just a couple of days a week. Justin too started to cut down on his shows; deciding to participate in only the most prestigious and take in just one long distance show a year and hope that maybe Brian would join him and they could make a vacation out of it as well. After all, Justin also no longer had to prove anything to himself or anyone else as his work was constantly sought after and large corporations as well as individuals now owned Justin Taylor originals. And Justin decided that maybe now was the time to begin his idea of teaching art to gifted youngsters; something he could do part time once their baby was a little older. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With various organizations offering gay couples help with having children, Brian and Justin began the search for someone suitable; a woman who would be willing to have Justin's child and who would allow them to bring him or her up as their own. They studied every possible candidate but months after their first inquiry, they still hadn't found someone they were both happy with. Justin had talked about their situation with Daphne, who admitted that although she loved the idea of having a baby and hoped she and Bill would be blessed in the near future, she quite honestly couldn't see herself ever being able to relinquish responsibility and allow anyone else to raise her child. Also, she didn't think Bill would be very happy and Justin had quite understood. But it was after he'd been discussing children with Chloe that he got the surprise of his life. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Justin talked to Chloe regularly and his more than usual interest in the twins has aroused her curiosity and then Justin had admitted that he and Brian were looking to start a family of their own. It had taken Chloe three days to think about it before she called Justin back and said she would like to have his and Brian's child. “Are you sure?” asked Justin, hardly able to believe their good fortune. “I've thought about it long and hard Justin ... if it hadn't been for the kids after I lost Grant ... I don't know how I would have survived ...” “They're all I've got left of him now ... after marrying Grant ... having the girls is the best thing I've ever done ...” “If you and Brian are serious about having a family ... then I'd love to be a part of that ... I'd still want to play a part in the baby's upbringing ... though you and Brian would have complete parental responsibility ...” “Yes ... of course ... we wouldn't want it any other way,” replied Justin. “Let me talk to Brian and then I'll call you back ...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After they'd discussed the possibility of Chloe having Justin's child, at Brian's suggestion, Justin called her back and asked if she and the children would like to come and visit for a while. Brian hired a private plane and a couple of weeks later, Chloe and the girls came to stay. The times Brian had met Chloe he'd always liked her. She was straight forward and to the point; qualities that Brian always admired, but he wanted to make sure that her reasons for volunteering were the right ones and not out of sentimentality owing to her grief for Grant. The kids enjoyed the space at the house and Brian arranged to hire a couple of ponies and they had the time of their lives. And after endless discussions, it was all too evident that Chloe would be the perfect Mother for their child, but Brian wanted to make sure things were all agreed and above board before arrangements were put in place and had tentatively raised the subject of payment. Initially, Justin was horrified at the suggestion that Chloe was seeking a fee for providing them with a baby, but luckily, Chloe hadn't taken offense and appreciated Brian's honesty and directness when it was mentioned. She agreed that it was something that should be discussed so that there were no misunderstandings, but sought to re-assure them that no payment, other than the medical expenses incurred during her pregnancy and the birth would be necessary. All in all, this looked to be the best possible arrangement, but after talking it over, Brian and Justin decided that the least they could do for Chloe was to make sure she and the girls were financially secure. Grant's life insurance had paid off the mortgage for the small house they'd been living in at the time, but with the girls growing and needing more space, a bigger house and garden would be more ideal. And put in the right way, also suggesting that as Chloe would be part of their child's life and the girls big sisters to their younger sibling, it would only be fair that the children spend time together and therefore, Chloe would need larger accommodation. And, when this was put to her the next time they all got together, Chloe grinned, knowing there was no way she could argue with that. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “Okay ... are you ready?” asked Brian quietly, as he undid the buttons on his shirt and he sat down on the bed; Justin grinned at him nervously. “This feels a little odd ... doesn't it?” the younger man asked as he pulled off his tee and discarded it. “Doing it ... not just because we want to ... well ... fuck each other's brains out ... but knowing there's going to be a baby after this ... our baby ...” and Brian nodded and stopped what he was doing. “If ... if you do want to do this on your own ...” Brian started to tell him, a little nervous that he might say yes, but instead, by way of an answer, Justin leaned across the bed and kissed him. “No ... this is going to be our baby ... yours and mine ... we'll do it together,” whispered the younger man and he pushed Brian's shirt off his shoulders. Brian smiled and pulling Justin towards him, brought the blond in for a deep kiss. Slowly, they undressed each other and spent long moments kissing, touching and caressing; arousing each other to the point where they could wait no longer. Kneeling on the bed, they faced each other and Justin smiled as their first time together came to mind and he took the condom from Brian and sheathed him. Then, taking the tube of lube from the nightstand, Justin squeezed some out into the palm of his hand. Reaching for Brian, Justin took the man's cock in his hand and covered him with the slippery substance while with the other hand, he caught Brian at the back of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Brian moaned at the taste of Justin and the touch of the younger man's fingers. Certainly none of the hundreds if not thousands of men Brian had slept with in his life ever touched him or reached him the way Justin could. And for Justin, knowing that Brian could have had his pick of so many men but that he was the only one who had made that connection; had been allowed inside those barriers, made him feel so special and important. And Brian had eventually conceded to what Justin had always known. That when he loved, he would love completely and though they'd done this so many times before, this occasion felt entirely different. This time there was a purpose other than a physical release or the need to feel close to each other. This was to create another life. Slowly, Justin started to pull away, but Brian stopped him and kissed him yet again and then he smiled at him and Justin turned around on his knees, with his back now to the older man. Leaning forward, Brian kissed the back of Justin's neck, the blond sighing deeply and closing his eyes as he felt Brian's hot breath against his skin. Then gently, Justin was caught around the waist and was slowly pulled down and backwards and Brian hesitated to ensure he was in the right position and Justin wouldn't be hurt as he was gradually impaled on Brian's cock. Justin moaned and reaching behind him, gripped Brian's thigh and pulling him in deeper; his other hand reaching around and burying his fingers in Brian's hair. For a moment, neither man moved as they became aware of the uniqueness of this occasion and with one hand across the younger man's chest and holding him tightly, Brian's fingers caressed Justin's nipple. Then, with his other hand, Brian reached around and took the younger man's cock in his grasp. Justin let out the air he realized he'd been holding in and twisting his head around, sought Brian's mouth and the men kissed and slowly at first, Brian began his thrusts. With his strokes matching his thrusts, Brian alternated his speed; quickening and then slowing down again to prolong this as long as both men were able, and wanting this to last as long as humanly possible. With his head back on the older man's shoulder, Justin closed his eyes and moaned as Brian's cock filled him and his touch took him to the edge time and time again and then brought him back. And, hearing Justin's moans of sheer delight spurred Brian on; wanting to pleasure the younger man who was now only just in control. And for Brian, it was like something he'd never experienced, not even with Justin, as their bodies molded together as one and he couldn't imagine a more deeper bond than what they were now trying to achieve. Giving and taking each other totally and willingly and as far as it was possible for two men to do so together, a life would be procreated. Reaching the point where he could no longer hold back, Brian's thrusts were now harder and faster. Lost in each other's bodies, Justin came first and he clenched, heightening Brian's own orgasm, and the younger man barely remembering, or able, to reach out for the container to catch the sperm. Brian was breathing heavily, having to concentrate on what he was doing in order to extract from Justin as much of the younger man's seed as possible and still achieving his own climax as he rode out the waves of his orgasm; his moans of pleasure now resulting in Justin's urgent need to produce as much life-giving elixir as possible. They'd talked about how they would do this and Brian had to admit how ashamed he was to think that he'd jerked off into a cup in the back room of Babylon; an act of selfish pleasure which had incredibly resulted in one of the best things that had ever happened to him: Gus. Chloe's insemination would take place at the clinic, but Justin had refused the suggestion of that sterile, antiseptic environment for him. Justin wanted him and Brian to play their part in the one place they had always been in tune with each other; where everything that had once been wrong with their relationship could always be righted: in bed. Justin had closed his eyes as Brian came; knowing from the years they'd been together, by the sounds and how the man's body shuddered when he'd reached that point, and Justin's heart leaped at the knowledge that he was responsible for the obvious pleasure Brian now experienced. And having ridden their orgasms to completion, sated and breathless, Justin turned his head and saw Brian open his eyes and smile at him; the younger man twisting his head around further to seek Brian's mouth once more. “I love you ...” whispered Brian and even now, Justin's heart would skip a beat whenever Brian said those words without any prompting and he smiled at him. “I love you too ...” and then carefully, Justin placed the container safely on the nightstand. With both men now soft, Brian stroked the back of Justin's head as he withdrew and still trying to catch his breath, sat down on the bed and he took off the condom. But before he could tie it off and discard it in the trash, Justin took it from him. Without hesitation, Justin reached for the container again and poured the contents of the condom into it before collecting the lid and securing it. Brian blinked as the consequences of Justin's actions slowly began to sink in and he couldn't prevent his eyes from misting up. “I meant it ... when I said this would be OUR baby ...” whispered Justin and he held Brian's gaze. Unable to speak for the lump in his throat, Brian tried to swallow; seeing in Justin's eyes the depth of the younger man's love for him. A love that, thank God, Brian was now able to return and that Justin had always known he was capable of; even if he hadn't himself. Brian reached out and took Justin in his arms, hoping the younger man knew how much it meant to him that Justin wanted them both to be the father of their child. It would be true to say both men were totally overtaken by the emotion of the occasion and for several long minutes, they just held each other; their bodies entwined and their hearts pounding at the knowledge of what they had done. For this baby wasn't going to be as the result of just a physical need for pleasure, but would be created out of two men's deep abiding love for one another. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “I hope this works,” stated Justin, a little worriedly, as they arrived at the clinic after hurriedly showering and dressing and Brian grinned at him. “Well ... if it doesn't ... think of all the fun we're going to have trying ...” Chloe and the doctor were waiting for them and Justin proudly handed over the container and then both men hugged the Mother-to-be. “But ... there is one thing I didn't think to mention,” stated Chloe and both a little panicked, Brian and Justin waited to hear what she had to say. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Three Months later: “Twins?” “You're having fucking twins?” squealed Debbie and Justin and Brian grinned at her like idiots. The insemination had succeeded first time and with twins prevalent in the family and now in her second trimester, Chloe's pregnancy was going along beautifully. With no cause for concern and no longer able to contain their excitement, the boys had decided now was the time to tell their family and friends. Brian didn't bother informing his immediate family. Joan Kinney would have been horrified to think of a child being brought up by two men and Brian had, in actual fact, never even got around to telling her about Gus. And as for his sister, Claire and her homophobic sons, Brian no longer even considered them family. But Jennifer Taylor had openly wept at the news, never in her wildest dreams ever thinking that her beautiful gay son would one day make her a Grandmother. The prospect of being a Step-Grandfather was only just sinking into Tucker, but having taken on responsibility for Molly, he knew that it was going to be inevitable one day and always liking and respecting both Brian and Justin, would adjust to his new circumstances without too much stress. Molly, too, was overjoyed to think she was going to be an Aunt. The gang was totally thrilled and even Lindsay and Melanie welcomed the news, though Melanie secretly hoped this would mean that Brian would lessen his interest in Gus. She never could accept Brian as part of their lives, knowing how close he and Lindsay had once been and still were, despite the distance between them. But Brian had no intention of reducing his contact with his son, he wanted all the children to regard each other as kin and wished to introduce Gus to the idea of having more brothers or sisters as soon as possible. But sitting with Debbie in the kitchen of her house while Carl was painting the downstairs window frames outside, Debbie had sensed something was on Brian's mind. Waiting until Justin excused himself to visit the bathroom, Debbie reached out and laid her hand on Brian's arm. Now in her sixties, her mind was as sharp as ever. “Okay ... out with it ... I can see something's bothering you ...” Brian smiled; there never was much he could get past Debbie. “There's nothing wrong Debbie ...in fact it's the opposite ... I couldn't be more relieved ...” and he saw her frown in confusion. “Twelve years is a pretty big difference,” announced Brian in his reference to the age difference between him and Justin. “I don't know why that's still bothering you,” stated Debbie. “It never worried Justin ...” “I know,” agreed Brian. “And don't get me wrong ... with the twins on the way ... and the way Justin and me are together ... I have never been happier in my whole life ...” and he sighed. “But my body's taken plenty of punishment over the years ... and I don't just mean the cancer ...” “I've always put in long hours ... and then there was the booze and the drugs ...” “And not forgetting all those beautiful guys,” stated Debbie, smiling, but she could see Brian was serious over something and the smile soon disappeared. “And I'm sure that lifestyle isn't without its consequences,” Brian continued. “But ... when I'm fifty ... Justin will still be only 38 ...” “There's a real chance that I'll go first ... and at least I know now that ... all being well ... Justin won't be on his own ... he'll have our sons ... or our daughters with him ... maybe even grandchildren ...” and Debbie heard the catch in Brian's voice and she squeezed his arm as she was about to deliver one of her pearls of wisdom; but she didn't get the chance. Brian closed his eyes as he felt the gentle touch of a hand on the back of his head as unheard by either himself or Debbie, Justin had come back downstairs. Initially, the younger man had hesitated at the top when he realized Brian and Debbie were having one of 'those' conversations, but when he heard Brian voice his concerns, he couldn't let those go unacknowledged and he sat down beside him and took Brian's hand. “There's no guarantees in life, Brian ... who knows what the future holds for any of us ... look at Grant,” stated Justin and Brian nodded reluctantly. “But our kids are going to have all the love they'll ever need ... for as long as either of us are around to give it to them ...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Having talked about the future after the babies' birth, Chloe announced that she would like to return to medicine at some stage, but of course wanted to be near all her children, a situation totally understood and accepted by Brian and Justin. Which is why as soon as possible, Chloe and her first-born twins would relocate to PA and to a nice house with a good sized garden in a quiet suburb of Pittsburgh and there were always openings at Allegheny General. Jennifer found them the perfect house with easy access to a good school and refused to take any commission. Brian and Justin arranged everything, including any decoration and furnishings and Chloe's move to the Pitts took place, relatively hassle free. Debbie enjoyed helping Chloe choose things for the new babies and in order not to tempt providence, they were kept at the older woman's house. Chloe knew from experience that getting enough of everything for two was a headache and was grateful for all the help she could get and Debbie was looking forward to her role as Grandma. Then Chloe was introduced to Daphne and Bill; the two women soon striking up a close friendship resulting from their common vocation and mutual friendships and it was Daphne who was Chloe's birthing partner; the boys waiting nervously outside and pacing, as all prospective Fathers are supposed to. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ “It's a boy ... and a girl,” stated the midwife and she grinned at them. Chloe, anxious for the twins fathers to see them as soon as possible, decided that as two gay men weren't going to take any notice of how she looked anyway, didn't bother to wait until she was as presentable as she might have been before asking that Brian and Justin be admitted in to see their newborns. Seeing Chloe smiling, the babies in cots by the side of the bed, transported both Brian and Justin back to the night Gus was born; the night they first met. “They're beautiful ...” whispered Justin as he slowly peered into one of the cots and he grinned back at Brian, who tried not to look quite as excited as he felt. “Now you've got one of each ... have you decided on names?” asked Chloe. They'd been asked, but all had refused being told the sexes of the children, wanting it to be a complete surprise when it happened. But having both a son and daughter in one go was more than any of them could have hoped for. Justin smiled at Chloe. “Well ... I picked the girls' names and the one I really like ... is Faith?” he asked anxiously and Brian grinned as he looked into the cot. “Faith ... I like that,” and gently, he stroked the baby girl's cheek with the back of his hand. “And Jennifer for her second name,” Justin continued. Brian grinned at him. “Your Mother will love that ...” “What about your son?” asked Chloe and Justin looked at Brian who had moved around the cots to be closer to the boy. “One of the names I came up with ... was Ruari ... he was King of Ireland ...” and he looked at Justin and grinned. “Just like Brian was ...” and Justin grinned back at him as Daphne, at Chloe's indication, leaned across and gently took Faith from her cot and handed her to her father. “And I was wondering,” continued Brian. “Would you object if his second name was ... Victor?” Justin grinned. “I think that's a terrific idea ... and Debbie's going to love it ...” “Go on ... you can hold him ...” urged Chloe and seeing Brian's hesitation, Daphne moved around and taking the sleeping child from his cot handed him to his father. Sitting on the bed, Justin looked down at the baby he was holding. “Then Faith and Ruari Kinney-Taylor it is ...” Carefully cradling his son, Brian blinked. Nothing had been said and he hadn't even considered the subject of the children's last name, but Justin obviously had and looking up, he met Justin's gaze; the unspoken love between them so tangible. The two women exchanged glances and Daphne returned Chloe's smile. Any doubts Chloe might have harbored, if only for a second, were totally dispelled. And she knew that being the means that allowed these two men to become fathers was going to be one of the best things she had ever done in her entire life. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chloe was obviously tired, so Brian and Justin didn't spend too much time at the hospital on their first visit. But having remembered to grab a camera at the last moment, they'd taken several photographs of the babies and a couple with Chloe, after she'd washed up a bit and Daphne had combed her hair for her and Chloe felt a little more presentable. They couldn't wait to take them home and with Debbie and Daphne volunteering to help out with Chloe's twin daughters, Chloe and her girls stayed at the house a couple of weeks while the new babies were settled into a routine and Brian and Justin were confident they could cope. Returning home on the day they became fathers, Brian and Justin celebrated in the only way they possibly could, but there was something Justin had to say first and he'd bitten his lip as he approached Brian. Though it had never actually been spoken of, he was certain Brian knew. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Since his health scare and suggesting they start a family, Brian had not been with anyone other than Justin. In fact he hadn't been with another man for many weeks before that time. Brian hadn't thought it had been a conscious decision to give up tricking totally, although the numbers had diminished significantly over recent years, but something that had seemed to be a natural progression of his realization that there was only one man he ever really needed. Justin too no longer sought out other men for exactly the same reason, though neither of them had mentioned it to the other and it seemed now they didn't have to; they knew. But before Chloe's insemination, Justin had rightly been checked out; in fact both he and Brian had and both had been given a clean bill of health, but it was only now that Justin was able to say what had been on his mind for so long. “You are the only man I have ever loved ... even when ...” and Justin stopped, unwilling to mention the time when he'd thought romantic words and gestures were more important than realities; when he'd thought that's what love was. But not wanting to remind either of them of that time, Brian reached out and placed his fingers on the younger man's lips. “Same here,” he whispered and Brian smiled at him. Reaching up, Justin took hold of Brian's hand. “Then you surely know ... that I don't want anyone else ... and I certainly don't need anyone else ...” and he saw Brian blink and then swallow and finally grin in submission; knowing what the younger man was leading to. “Neither do I,” stated Brian. “And there hasn't been anyone for a while now ...” he was eventually able to openly admit. Justin returned his grin. “Me neither ... and as far as I'm concerned ... there never will be again ...” and Brian nodded in agreement. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This was the first time they'd ever made love without using a condom, though in the past, the frantic need for each other had almost caught them out once or twice. With nothing now separating them, it was total connection: an even deeper bond then ever before. This was an intimacy and attachment like no other they'd shared between them. Justin closed his eyes as Brian came; an experience the younger man had never had before as he felt the hot liquid shoot inside him and he clenched, wanting to keep as much of Brian within him for as long as he could. For Brian, feeling the younger man's body around his own; flesh against flesh, was the final hurdle to be overcome. As now the last of any barriers that had once been between them no longer existed. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brian and Justin loved to spend as much time with their offspring as possible and though still working to a degree, all trips away were now reduced to a minimum and never both away at the same time. They did engage a nanny for day-to-day help, but after an initial settling in period, the evening and nights had always been theirs to cope with on their own. And often Justin would go in and look on the youngsters only to find Brian doing nothing more than watching over their sleeping children. The twins were growing up to be very happy and healthy and much loved by their entire extended family, who looked on totally amazed at how Brian, especially when the children were still babies, even managed diaper changing until the man reminded them that he did in fact have some experience from the occasions when he was allowed to look after Gus. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Five Years Later: Once the children were in nursery school and he had a little more time, Justin's wish to start an art school had begun by holding an art club at the GLC, back where it had all began for him, which soon proved to be incredibly popular. Justin's disposition was clearly ideal for imparting knowledge and the sessions, free to anyone who wanted to attend, soon became oversubscribed to the point where he knew he would have to look for somewhere larger. Justin's eye for spotting new talent meant that where this was evident, he undertook one-to-one tuition, drawing on natural ability and helping with technique. The center's annual Young Artists' competition, broken down into different age groups, was fiercely contested and after a few years, Justin was as proud as anyone to see one of his students accepted into the Art Institute for further development. The art club grew into becoming its own school and Justin sought and was granted registration. He now had to take on more staff, but determined to spend as much time with his own children as possible, Justin now solely took on the individual tuition, leaving his assistants to take the classes. Then, a few years later and following the illness of one of his student's parents, Justin became involved with using art as therapy, visiting the local hospital and offering his services to help with the recovering and healing process for anyone who might need them. Justin knew from his own experiences that working with therapists helped him regain the use of his hand; enabling him to continue his passion for art and reaching heights he would never have believed were possible and if he could do anything to return that help, then he was only too pleased. Whereas Justin helped develop their children's creative talents, Brian was always on hand to help with homework and school assignments. His words to Debbie had never been truer. He was happier now then he'd ever been and even though Justin's love for him was never doubted, it was only since having the children around him all the time did Brian realize what it was like to live as part of a loving family, something he never felt before, even the times when he had Gus. He would always be grateful to Debbie for trying to be the Mother he needed, but it had never been the same; it wasn't his family. Remembering his own childhood, even when the children were boisterous and doing stuff that kids just do, Brian never raised his voice with them and had never laid a finger on either of them in anger and neither had Justin, both of them always preferring to try and look at thing through the youngster's eyes. What Ruari and Faith got from both their Dad's, was an unconditional love that was demonstrated to them every day by the obvious care and affection both men felt; for them and each other. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ten Years Later: “Another note from your teacher?” groaned Brian and he looked at Faith. “This is the second this month ... who were you fighting with this time?” and his daughter put her hands on her hips and popped her gum. Always honest, Faith had no hesitation in telling her Dad why it was she'd stepped in when one of the older boys had picked on a smaller kid and Brian and sat back in his chair to study her. Brian loved his kids, all his kids, with all his heart. Gus was unmistakably his Father's son and was studying law and would soon qualify; that was obviously Melanie's influence, but he also had an artistic streak that was inherited from Lindsay. Ruari was fiercely independent, in actual fact, both the twins were and it wasn't hard to figure why; after all, there was a time when both their Dads were reluctant to accept help from anyone. With auburn hair and hazel eyes, Ruari was a good looking boy, growing taller every day and had already outgrown Justin. And he obviously had several of Brian's traits, especially the ones that included saying it how it was and being truthful to the point of 'Ouch, that hurt'. But there was no denying the sincerity in which you were told exactly what you ought to know and why. Faith was a pretty girl, though a smaller build and elfin-like with her short fair hair and startling blue eyes, but she was feisty and certainly not afraid of standing up for herself or anyone else she felt was the underdog or being picked on. Faith always insisted in dressing in pants or jeans and a shirt; always refusing to wear anything she considered to be too feminine and was more likely to be found taking an old bike apart with her brother and discussing football, than swooning over the latest teen pin-ups with her friends. The first time they realized, Justin couldn't help grinning at Brian. “Well ... there go all your Munchers' jokes ...” “Our daughter is not a Muncher,” stated Brian, emphatically. “She's ... she's ...” “A lesbian,” offered Justin and he reached up and squeezed Brian's shoulder. “Well ... I don't care ... she can be whatever the fuck she likes ... as long as she's happy ... and that goes for both of them ... agreed?” stated Brian. “Agreed,” affirmed Justin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Both Faith and Ruari were growing into two very popular young people and though from a privileged background, neither of them were spoiled to the point where they could just have everything they wanted. Brian certainly remembered what it was like to have very little money and was determined their children would appreciate everything they had. Both of them had to do their chores for pocket money and were encouraged to help out at the GLC though this mostly came from Justin, who still attended Pride Parades and even now persuaded Brian to join him; taking their children with them to add to the rallying call for gays and lesbians to stand up and fight for their rights. But both children had inherited Justin's artistic flair and there was every sign that despite her more masculine pursuits, Faith would want to follow in her Father's footsteps and go to art college. And even in middle teens, Ruari already showed an interest in Brian's business and it was hoped he would go on to Dartmouth and follow Brian into Kinnetik. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Faith and Ruari's Eighteenth Birthday: “Pop ... this is Ronnie,” stated Faith and Brian shook hands with the rather attractive red-haired woman, whose arm his daughter was hanging on to. “Good to meet you Mr. Kinney ... I've heard a lot about you ...” “I've heard a lot about you too,” replied Brian and he had. Always encouraged by their Fathers to talk about their friends, Faith had chatted non-stop about Ronnie over the last couple of weeks, and although he'd quickly caught on that this was another female, Brian hadn't quite been prepared for this and then he saw Justin glare at him. The house was filled with teenagers and although they intended making themselves scarce for some of the evening, Brian and Justin had decided to be there when most of the guests arrived, just letting them know the adults weren't going to be far away. Following a family lunch, that evening, Brian, Justin and Chloe were going to a next door neighbors, who themselves had teenagers who would be at the party. That way, the adults could be on hand and also drop by at any time, unannounced and Brian now watched as Faith took Ronnie by the hand and led her over to Ruari, who was with his girlfriend and their other friends. “Don't say a word,” instructed Justin as he now stood beside his husband, but Brian couldn't help himself. “She must be 30 ...” “29 ...” Justin contradicted him and as Brian was about to say there was no way he was going to stand for a 29-year old seducing his daughter, Justin reached up and kissed him. “What was that for?” Brian demanded and Justin just smiled and patted the older man on the chest. “Just to thank you for being you ...” stated Justin and Brian sighed and knew he was onto a no-hoper on that score; his and Justin's relationship being testament to how age differences needn't mean a damn thing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Shortly after the twins' birthday, Brian had sold all the clubs except Babylon Pittsburgh. This was where it had all began, when he and Michael had ditched their prom dates and danced with their shirts off and Brian got blown in the back room. Brian still liked to maintain an interest in his remaining club and continued to drop in from time to time just to make sure standards were being maintained. And though now a happy family man, it didn't stop him checking out the go-go boys, but no longer hands-on, of course. The sale of the clubs had made an obscene profit, which in part, he had invested for the children and was determined that all of his children, gay and straight, would be totally accepting of the community of which they were part. Combined with Kinnetik's continued profits, the funds also allowed Brian to invest in Justin's art school and jointly, they expanded its work with art as therapy. Consequently, the Kinney-Taylor Foundation for Arts and Therapeutics was born. A lot of the work involved helping young gay teens come to terms with their sexuality and it wasn't long before the Foundation's work in their chosen field was acknowledged; as was Brian and Justin's dedication and preparedness to continue to commit large sums of money in order to maintain and offer the resources to so many people who required them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The offices of the awarding body concerned happened to be on Liberty Avenue, Pittsburgh; the place Brian and Justin had first met all those many years ago. But when the Kinney-Taylor Foundation was recognized for its contribution to Arts and Humanities, this was the final accolade in long and illustrious careers for them both. Brian had to chuckle, surely not too many years ago, even an organization as large as theirs would have been frowned upon as to how it had been sourced. But as Brian had once said to Debbie; “This is America ... and money talks ...” and Debbie's reply echoed in his ears. “And for once ... it said the right thing ...” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Brian's Seventieth Birthday: Getting Brian to acknowledge any birthdays, let alone milestone ones had, in the past, never been easy, though his fortieth had gone off pretty much without the trauma everyone had been expecting. Learning that birthdays were worth celebrating had registered with him finally when the twins came along. And although he'd never really felt part of Gus' birthday celebrations, once he'd moved to Toronto, Brian had always made a point of visiting him on most of them, the girls never very willing to allow Gus away from them for those days. But having kids full time and being responsible for their day-to-day health and care; watching them grow and develop, their birthdays suddenly became much more important. It was a chance to celebrate, with Justin, in their good fortune. And so now, Brian would never let any of the family's birthdays go by without suitable acknowledgment and taking great pleasure in throwing huge parties for Justin's own milestones especially. His own seventieth though, was an age he used to think he'd never reach. Still fit and active, as Justin would willingly testify, Brian could be taken for a man many years younger than his actual age; in fact they both could. But his age on his driving license told him otherwise. And though he'd practically retired, Brian still couldn't give up work entirely. After all, he had a son in the business he enjoyed working alongside and who would eventually take over all together. Once Brian thought him experienced enough of course. Ruari though, had an eye for the ladies and was down as one of the most eligible bachelors around; a reputation he liked to upkeep and which sounded quite familiar. Faith was now a qualified art teacher and was working towards her Professorship. She and Ronnie were still together and about to start a family of their own and even Brian had to admit, he liked his daughter's choice of partner. And Gus was married with a family also; he and Justin already had grandchildren, whom Justin adored and who adored him. And though Brian could still remember that conversation with Lindsay all those years ago about how he had no intention of ever being in such a state, having kids and grandkids filling up his house and his life was just how he wanted it, even if it was still a little hard to admit to. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The house had been filled with people, coming and going, all day. It was beautifully decorated and the gang, mostly still going, were here. Apart of course from Debbie and Carl, who had both passed in recent years. As had Brian's real Mother and although he'd attended her funeral, he found he had no real feelings for her as she was laid to rest. Debbie's death had left both Brian and Justin mourning her badly, but especially Brian. And where Debbie's funeral had been a celebration of her life and the church filled to bursting, all Brian had been left with at Joan's was an emptiness, never really having had the Mother-son relationship he would have liked. Luckily, Justin was on hand and, as in all such difficult times, was there to offer him the comfort that Brian would now allow and in fact they comforted each other. Emmett looked around the house and was obviously pleased with the decoration. The man was still able to produce his best work, even though he and Drew now lived quietly in the country. Ted of course, like Brian, was with a much younger man who no doubt contributed to his longevity and Blake was still involved with drug counseling and often his world and Justin's collided if Blake thought a patient of his would benefit from one of the Foundation's therapeutic programs. Ted had retired several years ago and indulged in his opera and spent time giving his financial expertise to family and friends on a purely non-salaried basis. Michael had mourned his Mother's and Carl's passing of course, but had also grieved badly for Ben; the man's HIV state finally proving too much for that once beautiful body to take and he'd been lost some years before. But, joining a support group, Michael had met Peter and the two men had formed a bond and now lived together for companionship. Michael's real joy though was Hunter. Now a successful actor, his and Ben's adopted son had married, but with his inability to father children owing to his HIV status, Hunter adopted as well; his wife loving and supporting him totally. And thankfully, with the advances made recently, Hunter was expected to live a long and fulfilled life. Lindsay had managed the gallery in Toronto for the last ten years, but Melanie had retired several years ago and no longer practiced law, though like her brother, Jenny Rebecca was following in her Mother's footsteps and due to qualify next year. Melanie and Lindsay more or less led separate lives these days, but their love for their children kept them bonded and they still met and occasionally socialized, both of them preferring to stay in Canada in order to be near their families. And they'd all come down for Brian's birthday. Even Melanie, but Brian had thought probably not without much persuasion by Gus. Daphne still practiced medicine and Bill owned his own computer company, though they had one eye on retirement and also had a family of their own. Jennifer and Tucker had just arrived for the celebrations; Justin's Mother was still a remarkably beautiful woman even in her early eighties and despite Justin's initial distrust of Tucker, they had grown closer over recent years; his obvious love for Jennifer and Molly leaving Justin unable to dislike him. Justin and Brian were also Uncle's; Molly's marriage, though subsequent divorce, producing three boys. The other person who had always shared a huge part of their life of course, was Chloe, who had arrived with her husband and family. From day one, Faith and Ruari had grown up knowing she was their Mother and she'd always been there for them, though never stepping on Brian and Justin's toes when it came to parental responsibilities and advice. She loved the twins and they loved her and though theirs was an unconventional family, and with Gus instantly adoring his baby brother and sister, the amount of love between all of them surely outweighed all the perceived disadvantages. Even Jenny Rebecca considered them all part of her family. And then, five years after Chloe was widowed, the man who had received Grant's corneas and finally got to see after a childhood illness took away his sight, literally came looking to thank the donor's family. To say it was love at first sight would be so pathetically corny, but that is what it was and within two more years, Chloe was married again. Thankfully, Richard proved to be a loving husband and Father to the girls and accepting of his own, now extended family and Chloe's life was once more complete. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The day of the party had been warm and a lot of the guests were taking advantage of the pool with a huge barbeque meal having been served outside. It was the only practical thing to do, though Justin had suggested hiring a hotel. But for this occasion, Brian wanted everyone to be at the home he'd shared with his family. It was wonderful, seeing the gang that were left, they didn't get together half as much as they should and now made a conscious decision to do so a lot more often. After all, none of them were getting any younger and with the children bedded down upstairs, the celebrations went on into the night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Following Morning: Lindsay, Melanie and Jenny Rebecca had gone to stay with Michael and Peter for a few days, but Gus and the family were staying at the house in order to spend time with Brian and Justin and after the caterers had cleared everything away the following morning, still warm, everyone was again out by the pool. “Is Grandpa sleeping?” asked Aidan, Gus' youngest and Justin grinned. Comfortable on the loungers, Justin and Brian had both been reading while Gus, Kirsty, and their children had been swimming. But Aidan had climbed out of the pool and was toweling down and, as he did so, observed Brian, who, under the umbrella, appeared to have dozed off. “Shh ...” whispered Justin. “Grandpa had a busy day yesterday ...” “But I could still take both of you on ...” came the voice from the shade of the umbrella and suddenly reaching out, Brian caught Aidan and pulled him in, cuddling and tickling him mercilessly, but the boy loving it for all that. “And I wasn't sleeping ... I was just resting my eyes ...” stated his Grandpa and Brian grinned and patted the boy on the rump. “Aidan ... come and get your shirt on ...” called Kirsty, who had also climbed out of the pool and the youngster ran off to join her. “See you later Gramps ...” called Aidan, the collective name the men seemed to have acquired from their grandchildren. “What time are the kids coming over?” asked Brian and Justin looked at his watch. “Faith and Ronnie said they'd be here by 1:00, but Ruari can't get here until 2:00 ...” “Who's Ruari bringing with him this time?” asked Brian, shaking his head for it seemed like he had a different and always stunning girl on his arm every time they saw him. Justin grinned. “Who knows ... he's a chip off the old block ... that's for sure ... he obviously takes after you ...” and he returned to his book. “Why me?” asked Brian. “I remember you not exactly behaving like a monk yourself ...” and Justin grinned at him. “Well ... I wouldn't worry too much ... I'm sure he'll settle down ... eventually ...” and he shot a glance at the older man; a look that didn't go unnoticed by Brian. “We're gonna get cleaned up for lunch ...” called Gus and they watched as he and Kirsty took the kids inside the house; both Brian and Justin acknowledging them as they went. “Jeez those kids have grown ... we must get up there to see them again this year ...” stated Justin and Brian nodded and sighed. Justin frowned. “What's wrong ... still feeling the effects of last night's celebrations?” “I don't remember you complaining ... when we eventually got to bed that is ...” stated Brian smiling and Justin grinned at him. There might be twelve years between them and Brian might just have turned seventy, but he had the stamina of a man many years younger and their sex life, though surely not quite as frantic as it had once been, was certainly still fulfilling and frequent. But hearing something he couldn't quite put his finger on in Brian's voice, Justin put down his book and got up from his lounger and sat next to Brian. “Come on ... what's on your mind?” he asked him and Brian rolled his lips into his mouth before speaking. “I want us to spend as much time together ... and with the kids ... as we can, “ stated Brian. “I'm gonna retire completely and let Ruari take over ...” “That's great news,” declared Justin, obviously pleased. “Ruari will be thrilled ... and it's not like he hasn't worked hard to get where he is ...” “No ... and I'll be on hand if he needs me,” answered Brian. “Though I don't want him to make the same mistakes I did ...” “Mistakes?” queried Justin. “Don't tell me Brian Kinney has regrets?” and he saw Brian momentarily close his eyes. “I don't want Ruari to wait too long before he has a family of his own ...” “But as for regrets ... it's pointless looking back and regretting what you've done ... it'll just eat you up ... but there are certainly things I didn't do that I should have ...”confessed the older man. “Like what?” asked Justin and Brian took his hand. “Like telling you I loved you a helluva lot sooner for one ...” “I guess there was a lot of wasted time ...” sighed Justin and Brian nodded. “Mostly down to me ... and even once we got together ... it was like we were still too busy ...” “Maybe if I'd never gone to New York to begin with ... we would have been together right away ...” cut in Justin; knowing the part he'd played in their separations, but Brian shook his head. “That was never not an option,” stated the older man. “You had to go ... Christ ... look what you've achieved ... what we both have ...” “But what about all the time we never spent together when we could?” asked Justin and Brian smiled and squeezed his hand. “We're fags ... we're not some straight couple ... who have to live in each other's pockets ... who expect roses around the door ... and even after you came back ... I knew there would always be separations ... even the odd screw up maybe ... but there’s also something else I knew ...” and he looked down and fingered his wedding band. “Once we put on these rings and made that commitment ... I always knew ... from that moment on ... that we would always be together ... maybe not in the same city ... or even in the same country at the same time ... but still a couple ...” “I was sure we were so secure ... our love so dependable and unquestionable ... that it wouldn’t matter ...” “I knew you'd always be there for me and that I'd always be there for you ... two halves of a whole ... one incomplete without the other ...” “And maybe we did spend less time together than most other couples ... but the times we were together... they were all the more memorable ...” proclaimed Brian and Justin squeezed the man's hand in agreement and so happy that Brian now no longer had trouble expressing how he felt. “Better to spend a few wonderful weeks in each other’s company at a time than in a full-time relationship that became predictable and boring ... never having anything new to say to each other and filled with loathing and regret ...” acknowledged Justin and Brian nodded. “I knew that wouldn't be us and that we'd make it work ...” stated Brian and he took a deep breath, not realizing how much there had been to say. “I guess we found a way to make it work that suited us ... we survived and got even stronger,” stated Justin and Brian smiled. “Otherwise we wouldn't still be here ... still together ... and still in love ...” and reaching out, he drew Justin in for a kiss. “What say we go upstairs before lunch?” asked Brian as he pulled back and Justin could still see that unmistakable twinkle in the older man's eye and grinning as he got up off the lounger, Justin held out his hand. “So ... how are the plans coming?” asked Brian as Justin led him upstairs. “I'm not telling you ... it's a secret ...” replied Justin, but plans were now in place for another birthday celebration; one with the gang that this time would take place at Babylon Pittsburgh the following Saturday. “Hmm ...” frowned Brian. “As long as there's plenty of go-go boys ...” “Don't worry ... there will be,” chuckled Justin and he shook his head. Some things it seemed had never changed and he was grateful for it. Still together after all this time, both men now as much in love with each other as they had ever been, Brian knew that Justin had provided that piece of the missing puzzle; he was whole, complete; they both were. Their loved had allowed them to remain true to themselves and to each other and though their careers had kept them apart regularly, their love had found a way to surmount all odds and make them stronger and would sustain them for many more years of happiness still to come. They'd lived their lives how they'd wanted to; lives that had fulfilled them both and they had much to be proud of. Brian had once said it was only time. But who can measure time; estimate the length of eternity except to say that surely it will never end; exactly like Brian and Justin’s enduring and eternal, never ending love for each other. The End. April 17th, 2006 Thank you so much, Lois, for all your help, advice and contribution and to both Lois and Judy for their continued and much valued friendship.