“Yes, this is directly linked to the radiation treatments,” a male voice said that sounded very far away. The tone of the voice caused Justin to be very concerned; something was telling him that he needed to pay attention to the voice. Justin tried with all his might to focus on the voice, but couldn’t quite manage it. He felt himself quickly slipping back into the black oblivion of silence. 

The next time Justin remembered anything he was beyond excited. His heart was excitedly beating a rapid tattoo; his palms were profusely sweating; but he was smiling happily up into Brian’s equally smiling face. And that, Justin thought, was all that really mattered.  The official before them had just declared them husband and husband. Brian arched his eyebrow as he leaned down to kiss Justin. Justin eagerly opened his mouth and let Brian in. 

“Mmmm,” Brian said after ending the kiss, “You taste like home, Sunshine.” 

“So, do you,” Justin said as he leaned up to continue kissing Brian, but suddenly someone pulled him harshly away. 

“No!” he cried as he was pulled farther and farther away from Brian. The pulling continued until he could no longer see Brian. Everything went black and quiet.  

“It was always a possibility” Justin heard someone say. At least, that’s what he thought they said. The voice sounded really fuzzy like a bad radio reception. He was also sure that he’d heard the male voice before, he just couldn’t quite recall when or where. 

“What should our expectations be?” said a voice that he definitely knew. It was a strong female voice that he instantly recognized as his mother’s. He wondered why she sounded like she’d been crying. He should probably make sure that she’s ok. 

“M…” was all he got out before the world went black again and silence reigned. 

The sun was shining and Molly looked wonderful. She looked so beautiful and grown up. She was dancing with a tall, handsome man that was looking at her with adoration in his eyes. His mother was nearby and she had tears running down her face, but he could tell that they were happy tears. 

He felt warm arms wrap around him from behind and he turned his head just in time for Brian to kiss his cheek. 

“Having fun?” Brian asked him as he swept him onto the dance floor. Justin simply nodded, smiling widely. Brian expertly maneuvered them around the dance floor until Brian stopped dancing. He saw Brian gasp, felt a sharp pain to his head and stomach, and slipped into a dark world. 

“Shouldn’t he be awake by now?” Justin heard a loud voice ask. He wanted to tell them that the voice was giving him a headache, but his voice wouldn’t work. So, he did the next best thing- he moaned. 

“Justin?” several desperate voices called.

“Justin,” his mother said. “Justin, can you hear me?” 

“Mmmm,” was all he seemed to be able to get out, but, apparently, that was enough. 

“Oh, Justin!” his mother exclaimed as she grabbed one of this hands and brushed the hair out of his eyes with her other hand. “Someone let the doctor know that he’s awake!” 

Justin heard a door quickly open and shut.

“Mmm,” he tried to talk again, but it just wasn’t working. 

“Shhh,” his mother said, “Don’t talk. You’ve been really sick. The doctor will check you out and then we’ll know more.” 

He didn’t even try to talk again; he just nodded his head in agreement. Soon thereafter, the fatigue won, and Justin could feel himself slipping back into the land of sleep. 

“Thirsty,” Justin surprised himself by saying. His eyes blinked several times and he could see bright lights above him. 

“Oh, sweetie, you’re awake again!” Jennifer said as her face came into view above Justin. He gave her what he hoped was a slight smile. “Let me get you some water.” She poured something into a glass from a plastic pitcher. Helping to hold his head up, she gently placed the cup to his lips. Justin didn’t think he’d ever tasted anything as good as that room temperature water. 

His mother placed the cup down and said, “Let me tell the nurses that you’re awake again.” She walked away and he heard a door open. He adjusted himself a bit in his bed and noticed that someone else was in the room with him. There on the far side of the room looked to be Brian. 

“Brian?” he gasped out. 

Brian uncrossed his legs and shifted forward in his seat. Justin could quite clearly see that it was indeed Brian. He took a moment to savor the fact that Brian Kinney was there, but then everything that had happened hit him. He remembered the trick. He remembered how Brian had made him feel. He remembered that Brian didn’t want his love. 

“No.” Justin clearly said. 

“Justin?” Brian said, standing up and moving towards the bed, “Are you all right?” 

“No! Get out! I won’t let you hurt me again!” Justin screamed. He heard the room to his door fly open and several people entered. 

“Mr. Taylor?” a woman that he didn’t recognize called his name. She was obviously a nurse. “Mr. Taylor?” 

“Get out!” he yelled. “No! No! No!” 

The nurse turned to Brian. “I’m sorry, Mr. Kinney, but I can’t let the patient be upset. I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” 

Brian tried one more time, “Justin, please.” The expression on Brian’s face was pleading, but Justin knew it wasn’t real. He knew that Brian just wanted to be the Knight in Shining Armor; he didn’t really want nor need Justin. 

“No!” Justin exclaimed, “I won’t let you keep hurting me!” 

“Please, Mr. Kinney, I need you to leave.” the nurse implored. Justin felt slightly better when he saw Brian turn to leave, but was confused when his mother put a comforting hand on Brian’s forearm before he left the room. 

“Now, Mr. Taylor, I want you to calm down,” The nurse said again. “The doctor will be here in a moment and will want to look you over. We don’t want you all excited then, ok?” Justin nodded his agreement and settled himself on his hospital bed. 

Jennifer walked over, grabbed his hand, and rubbed it while she held it. 

When the nurse left, Justin turned towards his mother and demanded, “What was he doing here?” 

“Not now, Justin,” she said, “We’ll talk about it later. The doctor could be here any minute.” 

“Mom,” Justin started to ask again, but stopped when she looked at him. 

“Not now, Justin.” She reiterated. Justin nodded. 

A few seconds later, a man in a white lab coat walked in. He was short, a bit on the rotund side, and had a large, handlebar-styled mustache. Justin thought he looked rather comical; he certainly looked jovial. 

“Well, Mr. Taylor,” the man said, holding out his hand, “It’s nice to finally meet you.” Justin shook the outstretched hand. “You’ve had a rough week or so. What do you last remember?” 

“I think I was at the diner with Emmett and Daphne. That’s the last thing I remember- well, that and a couple of people calling my name as my vision went black.” The doctor looked to his mother to confirm this. She affirmed with a nod. 

“Very good. Can you tell me your name?” 

“Justin Taylor,” Justin said with a bit of a smirk. He wondered if the doctor was going to confirm this with his mother, too. He didn’t.

“Great! Let me fill you in on what has happened. We were informed by your mother, friends, and partner that you are currently undergoing radiation treatment for testicular cancer.  Learning that, I contacted your oncologist. He assured me that they feel that the surgery got 100% of the cancer and are doing the radiation treatments as more of a precautionary statement than anything else. That being said, the radiation treatments have severely hindered your immune system. Thus, you got a really nasty intestinal infection. It was touch and go for awhile, but I think we have it under control.” 

“Intestinal infection,” Justin restated. “So, some of the nausea, vomiting, and stuff wasn’t just the radiation side effects?” 

“In your case, Justin, no they were not. You had a serious bacterial infection in your intestines. When they brought you into the emergency room eight days ago, you were running an incredibly high temperature and your body was in severe distress; however, I think we have everything under control. I’ll need you to stay here a few more days; we want to make sure the fever doesn’t return. Once you are ready to go home, I'll change you from IV antibiotics to oral ones. And I must insist that you take all of these antibiotics, no matter how good you feel, ok?” 

Justin nodded his agreement. 

“Good. Well, do you have any questions you’d like to ask?” 

Justin thought for a moment, “So, I can go home in a day or two?” 

The doctor nodded, “Yes, I think that’s realistic, but you will need to follow up with your GP and your oncologist. They’ll need to decide how they want to continue your radiation treatment, if at all.” 

“Ok,” Justin said. He felt his eyes getting very heavy. The doctor must have noticed because he said for Justin to get some rest, nodded to Jennifer, and quietly left the room. Justin wanted to talk to his mother, but he was just too tired. He was soon in dreamland. 

When Justin woke the next morning, he noticed that Jennifer and Daphne were fervently whispering in the corner. 

“Mom?” he called out. 

“Justin, good morning, how are you feeling?” Jennifer asked as moved to stand by his bed. 

He smiled, “Not too bad. Hey, Daphne, how are things?” 

Daphne came over to the bed, grabbed his hand, and said, “Better now that you are awake. You had us all worried. I thought Brian was going to lose it when you collapsed at the diner.” 

Justin snorted at her statement about Brian. He saw a look pass between Daphne and his mother. “What?” he inquired. 

“Nothing,” Daphne unconvincingly said. 

“Right,” Justin sarcastically said, “Nothing. Let’s try this again: What?” 

Jennifer spoke up this time, “Well, Justin, it’s just that you reacted really badly to Brian being here when you woke up. I know you are having issues, but was it really necessary to react that way? You hurt him badly.” 

“You’ve got to be kidding me! First off, you’ve never really approved of our relationship, so I would have thought us breaking up would have had you dancing in the streets.” 

“Now, Justin,” his mother interrupted, “I might have had some issues with Brian in the beginning, but he has more than proved that he cares about you.” 

“When? When he fucked a trick in front of me because someone hurt his precious ego? Or was it when he fucked a trick in front of me to make sure I understood that I wasn’t that important to him. Or how about when he fired me from Vanguard because I said something to a client? Or when…” 

Jennifer’s eyes got big, but she continued on, “How about when he took you in after the bashing? How about when he helped pay for you to go to P.I.F.A.? How about when has done a million different things? I’m not saying that he’s perfect. Hell, I know he’s not perfect, but he’s Brian, and you love him. You love him.” 

“Well, I might love him, but he doesn’t love me. He doesn’t want me to love him. He’s made that more than clear. So, I think it’s time that I move on and find a way to be happy without Brian Kinney.” 

“Fine,” Jennifer, said, “If that’s what you think you need to do.” Justin sat back and felt vindicated. “But,” Jennifer continued, “Not until you’ve talked to Brian. You owe him that.” 

“I don’t owe him anything but the money I took to pay for school.” 

“Justin,” his mother sad with sadness, “I know you don’t believe that. I’ll support you no matter what you do, but I have to say what I think is right- And I think the right thing is to, at the very least, talk to Brian. Hear him out, ok? Just hear him out.” 

Justin was not amused, but he could tell by the look on Daphne’s face that she agreed with his mother. “I’ll think about it. That’s the best I can offer.” 
	
Jennifer gave him a small smile and rubbed his arm, “That’s all I ask. Well, I better get home. I need to grab some food on the way home and pick up your sister from Kelly’s house. I’ll see you tomorrow, ok? Oh, I might be a little later than normal. I have to show a client a house first thing tomorrow morning, but I’ll get here as soon as I can, ok?” 

Justin nodded. He waited until his mom had left the room before he turned to Daphne, “And I guess you agree with my mother?” 

She didn’t say anything. She just took his hand, kissed the back of it, and nodded that she did. Justin sighed. He had a lot to think about.