Note: Most of this part is in second person --------------------------------------------- BRIAN As I reluctantly climbed the steps I wondered for the hundredth time why I even bothered to come to Deb’s dinner. Of course it didn’t take ME long to figure it out. I refused to let anyone know how deeply my break up with Justin was hurting me. And even more I wanted to prove that seeing Justin and Ethan together didn’t bother me. So, I’d come. I was fashionably late as was my habit. I stood on the porch looking at the door, listening to the laughter and voices coming from inside. I took a deep breath grasped the gold metal doorknob and opened the door. I’d prepared myself for the looks of surprise I’d receive when I walked through Deb’s door. THE FAMILY Conversation ceased as Brian entered the house. All eyes turned to him, then of course quickly shot to stare at Justin and Ethan. Justin looked a little uncomfortable as he watched Brian; Ethan gave Brian a smug challenging look. *Arrogant bastard,* Brian thought to himself. *And why shouldn’t he be*, Brian’s thoughts continued sourly, *Ethan did have Justin.* Brian shook off the thought to concentrate on the matter at hand; getting through this so-called family dinner. No one spoke as Brian made the short walk from the door into the dining room his long legs covering the distance in mere seconds. The silence was becoming very obvious and unsettling. No one had offered Brian a greeting as he entered. He raised an eyebrow sardonically as he took in everyone present. He remained standing for a few seconds letting everyone adjust to his presence. Waiting for someone to verbally acknowledge that he was there. Justin tried not to but he couldn’t help but drink in the sight of Brian when he’d walked through the door. Brian wore one of his black leather jackets and underneath a greenish gray pullover that was about the same color as his eyes. The stretch material of the pullover fit snugly over Brian’s well-defined shoulders, and clung to his upper body. Brian had a great upper body without an ounce of fat. It was toned, firm, muscled, but not the overly pronounced muscles that so many jocks had. Brian was wearing the black jeans that Justin loved. He wondered if Brian even remembered how much he liked seeing him in those Jeans or that it was he who had convinced him not to give them to the Salvation Army. Brian had told him they were the first pair of designer jeans he bought when he got a job after college. They had been washed so many times that the color was more of a gray than black, the fabric was soft and practically hugged every inch of Brian’s lower body. The material caressed his firm ass cheeks, molded to his muscled thighs and emphasized his long go on forever legs. Brian looked *fuck me sexy* in those jeans. Justin quickly dropped his eyes and hoped no one saw how hard he had stared at Brian or the *hard on* in his pants. He shifted to uncomfortably to relieve the tightness in his pants. Ethan knew that Justin had tried to watch Brian covertly but he noticed everything Justin did. He’d Seen and heard the tell tale hitch in Justin’s breath and the flush in his cheeks as he watched Brian. Ethan threw his arm possessively around Justin’s shoulder and kept it there. He couldn’t wait for this dinner to be over. “About time you got here,“ Deb admonished breaking the uncomfortable silence. It seemed as if everyone in the room gave a silent sigh of relief that someone had finally acknowledge Brian‘s presence. “You’re almost an hour late.” Brian gave Deb his trademark smirk, “Well, I’m here now,“ he said as he sauntered to the empty seat next to Michael. He turned the chair backwards, shrugged off his jacket and draped it over the back of the chair as he straddled it and sat down. “Hi ya, Mikey,” he said leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. As a greeting to the others he gave his patented Kinney tongue and cheek smirk and raised his left eyebrow, “Evening everyone,” he said He heard everyone respond to his greeting but his ears perked up as he heard Justin’s deep *Hi, Brian* he didn’t pay much attention to the other greetings. He looked around at everyone at the table. Deb held the *family dinners* as she called them in the dining room instead of the kitchen. The table in the dining room could seat more than 12. Brian took in all the expectant faces around the table. Everyone watching to see what would happen. Everyone waiting to see how the drama would play out between him, Justin and Ethan. It was the first time since the Rage party that they had been in the room with them. Brian had no intention of giving anyone a show. To be exact other than a polite hello he had no intention of even acknowledging Justin and his new *lover* were there. Brian casually scanned the room. He had decided his best course of action was to treat Justin like he treated everyone there. He didn’t single him out to speak to him or purposely ignore him. Brian quickly took in the seating arrangements. Vic was sitting at the head of the table on one end and Debbie at the other end. Next to Vick was his new boyfriend Rodney on his right next to him, then Lindsey and Mel and Emmett then Ted. To the left of Vic were Justin, Ethan, Ben, Michael and he took up the seat next to Deb. Brian tried not to stare at Justin but in the quick glance he gave him he noticed the black turtleneck pullover hugging his slim upper body and the dark cargo pants. A vivid contrast to his fair coloring. It hadn‘t escaped his notice that Justin was wearing more darker and somber colors since leaving him. Most likely Ethan’s influence. He’d also noticed that Justin had gained a little weight. It looked good on him. Brian's eyes briefly swept over Ethan. Brian could size a man up in less than 30 seconds it took him less to size up Ethan. Ethan didn’t have a great body. For a man in his twenties his body was a little doughy and soft. It lacked definition. Ethan had no discernible, pecs, biceps, abs or thighs. He didn‘t have much of an ass and even his dick wasn’t that noticeable. Brian did admit that Ethan was good looking and had the dark soulful eyes that some men found irresistible, apparently even Justin. Brian knew Ethan’s looks were not the main reason that Justin was with him. When it came to looks Brian knew Ethan didn‘t hold a candle to him. Justin was with his *dreamy eyed schoolboy* because he gave him the words, the gestures of love that Brian knew he had never given Justin. When Justin met Ethan he was a young man starved for romance. Ethan fed him all the romantic bullshit he needed and wanted. Brian berated himself 100 times a day--more for being unable to---no for being unwilling to give Justin the romantic bull crap the *drama princess* in him craved. Brian let that train of thought go. Now was not the time or the place to think about it. Instead he focused on the reason he did come to Deb’s. “So what’s for dinner, Deb,” Brian asked swiping a bread stick off Michael’s plate. The conversation picked up as everyone tried to cover the uncomfortable silence of only a few moments before. Lindsey talked about Gus, his new pre-school and how well he was talking. Mel bragged over and over about how she got pregnant on the first try, other than that first scare she got which turned out to be nothing she was having a relatively easy pregnancy. She was already predicting that she was going to be a great *career* mother. She was now 7 months pregnant and to Brian she reminded him of a penguin; a irritable, sarcastic, bitchy penguin. Brian tried to ignore Ted and Emmett but unfortunately for him it was impossible. They made him want to puke with the PDA. Ted was slowly feeding Emmett a breadstick and kissing him in between each bite. It made Brian cringe. Vic asked Justin about his art which he said was okay, but that gave Ethan a chance to talk about his upcoming concert dates. Ethan expounded on his talent, how great he was doing. He hadn’t noticed that no one was paying him a lot of attention not even his boyfriend. The dinner progressed. Everyone seemed to let out a sigh of relief as they realized that other than acknowledging their presence Brian seemed to accept Ethan and Justin at the dinner party. By now Ethan and Mel seemed to vie for center of attention. Mel wanting everyone to be amazed at her feat in being pregnant. Ethan wanted praise for his great talent and flourishing popularity. Deb finally got control of the conversation and bragged on Michael and Melanie. Deb was just so proud that she was a grandmother in waiting. Especially since being the mother of a gay son she never thought she‘d be a grandmother. Conversation flowed. Everyone took their drinks and moved from the dining room to lounge more comfortably in the living area. Vic cut on some music and the slow soft sounds from an oldies station filled the air. The atmosphere was relaxed, easy and comfortable. The family dinner was going better than anyone expected. ***************** I climbed the steps laden with the heavy box I brought with me. I placed it at my feet. I stood in front of the door and took a deep breath. I heard talk and laughter floating from inside the house. It was such a quaint house. The house I lived in was 4 times this size. I could tell it was a happy loving home. So unlike the house I lived in. It had been a long time since I remembered a dinner with my family where laughter floated around. I missed dinners like this. I missed a home filled with laughter as this one definitely was. I stood up straight, arranged my purse on my shoulder, gathered all my strength around me and knocked forcefully on the door. The moment of truth had arrived. Everything that would happen from this point forward in my life and theirs had been foretold. Every step I’d taken since I ran from the fortune teller’s tent years ago led me to this point in my life. Behind this door was where the end of my life would begin.